My old habits....

Last night I was reflecting on the person I have become and I realized that over the course of the last year and a half my life has changed pretty dramatically, for the better.. mainly because of the healthy lifestyle that I have finally decided to adopt.... you see, I used to be overweight, and I'll even use the word tubby/fat/ect. It was bad! My outlet for anything was food.. if I was stressed, i would eat, if I did something great, I would reward myself with food, in order to make other people happy I would feed them... however, that has all changed now.. I now ease my stress by working out, and I reward myself with manicures, and I now try to also feed others healthier options. It has changed my outlook on life.. and I can tell you that for the first time in a long time, I'm proud of myself, and I'm proud of where I came from to where I am today.

During my reflection I thought I would share a few things that I used to do in my past.. along with a few pictures... to show you how my life has dramatically changed

-I used to LOVE sundresses, because there was no waist line, and you couldn't tell how big I was.. a Large fit and there wasn't a number correlated to it

-I avoided the scale as if it was the plague. I was afraid of the number that I would see, even at the doctors office, I would stand on the scale backwards, and make sure they didn't tell me what it read. [looking back I wish I weighed myself at my heaviest so I would know accurately the weight loss that I have had over the course of the last 18 months]

-I wore a pair of jeans to bed at night [before our trip to Boston] to stretch them out [i couldn't afford to buy a new pair of pants, however I needed more than 1 pair for the 5 day vacation]

-I used to go through the drive through and waiver on what to get for dinner, either a hamburger combo or a chicken sandwich combo.. when I couldn't decide, I would go for the hamburger combo and tack on a 5 piece nugget [and eat it in the car before i got home] or go for the chicken sandwich combo and get a jr hamburger to go along with it! GROSS!

-I would hide behind justin in pictures, use a pillow to cover my mid section, use picnik to crop out anything that looked large, or use anything to hide my mid section


-I used to thrive on buying shoes and accessories.. because they will always fit, regardless of how much you weigh

-I would go to the gym, try and work out on the elliptical for 20 minutes, cut it short at 10 minutes and think I had a "good" workout.

There are days when I get discouraged because the scale doesn't reflect the effort that I put in the night before at the gym, or the healthy options I'm eating, but I need to look back at how far I have come in this journey.

Looking back at my old habits, I am embarrassed of who I let myself get to, and I knew that I had to want to lose weight for myself, not for anyone else, and I had to have the motivation and drive to do it.